Solid start to the 1s season next to a large home crowd
LUMHC 1s Vs UCLAN 1s (5 – 1 Win)
This match report has been eloquently created by Egg and thus will show all events throughout the game in an unbiased and factual manner.
The day started off as most of Eggs do, with eggs for brunch. As I had no timetabled lectures, I had a lovely lie-in in Jamie’s bed then went and got ready for the day’s game. Got on my socks, shorts, sliders and lucky boxers (the ones with a hole in). It was at this point in the day when I realised my glove had been misplaced a problem which did come back to haunt me at 10 minutes 27 into the match.
Following from that juicy introduction I shall walk you through the day’s match, very much as Gas did the whole game (ever heard of running). Anyway, the UCLan clan arrived and it was clear both teams were wearing the same kit, unfazed, Mel took the executive decision to play with our shirts inside out introducing the 2019/ 2020 seasons alternative strip.
The game starts.
A cracking pass from Egg to Mel to Perraton to GI Joe resulted in an early goal being put past the keeper. 1 – 0 within the first 5 minutes. A short period passes, Splish Splash actually arrives to watch his boys play and the UCLan forward tells Egg that the guy on the megaphones chat is weak. Egg agrees.
The events leading up to the second goal for LUMHC are hazy but are most likely to involve bits from Archie, Perraton picks up the ball top D and strolls round the UClan keeper putting the ball into the empty net. 2 – 0.
Fletch is playing poorly as usual, @Tom Fay take him please. Gas wins the first short of the game, Egg pulls out a perfect injection exciting Milf on the side-line with him claiming “Watching Egg stretch his legs and inject the short is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen”. Gas misses the short of course, a reoccurring problem throughout the day’s game. There are another 27 short corners for LUMHC in the first half, none of which actually led to a goal (other teams in North 2a take notes).
Rory speaks to a UClan player as he’s dribbling and makes him go weak at the knees, UCLan kid inevitably falls at his feet and Rory wins another short corner for the bois. It do be like that sometimes.
A silky period of play by Gabe leads to Perraton’s 2nd goal of the game, a 20-minute jug is on the horizon… sexy. 3 – 0.
Half time comes and UClan have a half an hour team talk, Egg and Mel have a lie down to catch some rays from the rare sunny weather in Lancaster.
The 2nd half is clearly controlled by the fan favourite UClan number 27 who is the man of the year, you can come back anytime you want to. Now comes to a controversial point in the game, Egg’s unjustified sending off. Following a swift counter attack from UCLan, he was the last man and for some reason his stick turns into a shoe and kicks the ball away from a very moody attacker. Genga gets his Uno cards out and shows Egg a green, unfortunately he did not bring the Uno reverse card to hit him with a right bamboozle.
The team falls apart and UClan convert their first short corner of the game into a goal, probably was number 27 let’s not lie. 3 – 1.
Very similar to Lancaster’s 3rd goal, Gabe does bits and Perraton scores. 20-minute jug chants fill the stadium. 4 – 1.
A hot headed UClan CB believes that in order to win the game he must take out Mr Perraton, unfortunately instead of receiving 5 free goals he just gets a yellow card. Genga says it’s a P Flick, Nick says no. Short corner it is, surprise, surprise, this ends up as a UCLan 16 hit.
To round off the game, the international stallion Gabe puts the ball away for another LUMHC goal. Again, I would say that Archie did bits leading up to this and Rory sweet talked the UCLan boys out of the way. 5 – 1.
Not much else happens for the final 5 minutes and the final whistle blows.
MoM: Tom Perraton
DoD (wrongly): Eggward
The day is finished off with a Fletch wine and the first official LUMHC social of the year.
LUMHC 1s Vs UCLAN 1s (5 – 1 Win)
This match report has been eloquently created by Egg and thus will show all events throughout the game in an unbiased and factual manner.
The day started off as most of Eggs do, with eggs for brunch. As I had no timetabled lectures, I had a lovely lie-in in Jamie’s bed then went and got ready for the day’s game. Got on my socks, shorts, sliders and lucky boxers (the ones with a hole in). It was at this point in the day when I realised my glove had been misplaced a problem which did come back to haunt me at 10 minutes 27 into the match.
Following from that juicy introduction I shall walk you through the day’s match, very much as Gas did the whole game (ever heard of running). Anyway, the UCLan clan arrived and it was clear both teams were wearing the same kit, unfazed, Mel took the executive decision to play with our shirts inside out introducing the 2019/ 2020 seasons alternative strip.
The game starts.
A cracking pass from Egg to Mel to Perraton to GI Joe resulted in an early goal being put past the keeper. 1 – 0 within the first 5 minutes. A short period passes, Splish Splash actually arrives to watch his boys play and the UCLan forward tells Egg that the guy on the megaphones chat is weak. Egg agrees.
The events leading up to the second goal for LUMHC are hazy but are most likely to involve bits from Archie, Perraton picks up the ball top D and strolls round the UClan keeper putting the ball into the empty net. 2 – 0.
Fletch is playing poorly as usual, @Tom Fay take him please. Gas wins the first short of the game, Egg pulls out a perfect injection exciting Milf on the side-line with him claiming “Watching Egg stretch his legs and inject the short is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen”. Gas misses the short of course, a reoccurring problem throughout the day’s game. There are another 27 short corners for LUMHC in the first half, none of which actually led to a goal (other teams in North 2a take notes).
Rory speaks to a UClan player as he’s dribbling and makes him go weak at the knees, UCLan kid inevitably falls at his feet and Rory wins another short corner for the bois. It do be like that sometimes.
A silky period of play by Gabe leads to Perraton’s 2nd goal of the game, a 20-minute jug is on the horizon… sexy. 3 – 0.
Half time comes and UClan have a half an hour team talk, Egg and Mel have a lie down to catch some rays from the rare sunny weather in Lancaster.
The 2nd half is clearly controlled by the fan favourite UClan number 27 who is the man of the year, you can come back anytime you want to. Now comes to a controversial point in the game, Egg’s unjustified sending off. Following a swift counter attack from UCLan, he was the last man and for some reason his stick turns into a shoe and kicks the ball away from a very moody attacker. Genga gets his Uno cards out and shows Egg a green, unfortunately he did not bring the Uno reverse card to hit him with a right bamboozle.
The team falls apart and UClan convert their first short corner of the game into a goal, probably was number 27 let’s not lie. 3 – 1.
Very similar to Lancaster’s 3rd goal, Gabe does bits and Perraton scores. 20-minute jug chants fill the stadium. 4 – 1.
A hot headed UClan CB believes that in order to win the game he must take out Mr Perraton, unfortunately instead of receiving 5 free goals he just gets a yellow card. Genga says it’s a P Flick, Nick says no. Short corner it is, surprise, surprise, this ends up as a UCLan 16 hit.
To round off the game, the international stallion Gabe puts the ball away for another LUMHC goal. Again, I would say that Archie did bits leading up to this and Rory sweet talked the UCLan boys out of the way. 5 – 1.
Not much else happens for the final 5 minutes and the final whistle blows.
MoM: Tom Perraton
DoD (wrongly): Eggward
The day is finished off with a Fletch wine and the first official LUMHC social of the year.